Not What I Meant
by ForestBornNinjaGirl
Summary: One-Shot. Nya contemplates the difficult choice that is presented her. Tag to the two new episodes. Author's Note inside explains more.


**Author's Note: Just a one-shot in Nya's POV. I don't know how many of you have wanted a more female aspect of the show, even though it was probably originally geared for boys. When the season opened with the two new episodes, I was hoping for maybe new female ninja, like possible girlfriends or something. Maybe even female enemies that turn into allies. But Nya's problem of choosing between Cole and Jay is NOT what I was hoping for. Sure, it's a female conflict but still **_**not what I meant**_**. This is for those of you who agree. For those who don't, I hope this does not offend.**

**Disclaimer: If I owned Ninjago, I would not be complaining, so I clearly have no say in the series.**

Not What I Meant

Nya's POV

I toss and turn for hours. My hair is tangled and my covers are twisted over my bed but I can't succumb to sleep. Finally I toss aside the blanket and begin pacing across my small bedroom. A conflict has been plaguing my thoughts for the last few days. This clash always invades my thoughts, no matter the topic, and it seems impossible to find a solution.

When I was younger, I liked to imagine that my life was a story or a (not so) glamorous T.V. show or movie. Everything would be based off of my life, but I laugh now, thinking _what's the chance of that happening_? When Kai became a Ninja, a whole new metaphorical chapter in my life began. There was a lot less contact with the outside world and a lot more danger. Not to mention only having boys as company. Granted, the guys aren't that bad and their dedication and bravery are inspiring, but I do get lonely, often time being the only girl in the gang. Each of them have a special place in my heart, but Jay is different. I thought he would be the only one that would stand out to me as a possible love interest and I was happy. Well, apparently I _thought_ wrong and I'm nowhere _near_ happy anymore.

Ever since my students dragged me over to that stupid Perfect Match Machine and it said the true love of my life was Cole, I started to see him in a different light. But every time I started on that train of thought, another part of me jumps to life and defends Jay. It's a huge debate on their "pros" and "cons" and I end up driving myself crazy. Crazy to a point where I even confided in Misako! Not that I don't have respect for her; it's just that she's one of the last people I would normally reveal my secrets to.

I sigh and lie down on my bed again. I run through my pros and cons list one more time, hoping to clear my mind so I can finally get some rest. I always start with Jay. Jay… Jay is funny and cute and a little… delusional… sometimes, but he's a great guy. He has a shy side and can be talkative and annoying, too, but he's always supportive and gives a hundred and ten percent of himself in any situation.

And then there's Cole. Cole is… everything Jay's not. Cole is the most serious of the group as the leader, so I guess it's understandable and he does have a sense of humor. He's strong and talented and even though he's a little gruff, he really cares for all of us. And I guess that would include me too. But thinking of Cole as more then a close friend makes my gut twist. I mean, a lot of girls would probably give anything to get asked out by a guy like Cole, with his looks and muscles. And he will make one lucky girl very happy one day.

You might say I have a bit of problem on my hands.

When I think about my life as a story, this chapter in my life is a big one. But as the story continues to play out, a part of me wishes there was something different about it. I'm not talking about living through all of those terrifying moments, facing skeletons and Serpentine, or being turned evil at the hands of Lord Garmadon. What I wish for is to have another girl, preferably around my age, around on the Bounty when everything was still new and terrifying. I wasn't completely sure of this "destiny" of Kai's, especially when all we had was each other. And as time passed on all I had for company was a bunch of boys. I had occupied myself with my Samurai X suit, but it didn't fill the void of a real human presence. But becoming the Samurai had solved some of my problems. I could now go out and help people, not just stay back at the Bounty, waiting for my brother and the rest of the ninja return from their missions. I guess after a while, I got used to being the only girl in an all-boys club. And when Sensei Wu thought I had the potential to be the Green Ninja, I was awed that he would even consider me! But at the time I was happy with my new pastime as the Samurai and that was enough for me.

But now I have more than enough problems on my hands, especially with the school and the return of the Overlord and all, but I guess I could have seen this particular one coming. Choosing between boys is a problem every girl goes through at some point. I think. But for me, it _had_ to between ninjas. I faintly remember praying to the First Spinjitzu Master to send _something_ to spice up my fairly lonely life, but he clearly got my message late. This problem of having to choose between Jay and Cole is not what I meant.

**So-so ending, I know. I did my best. Out of curiosity, have any of you ever imagined your life as a story or a sit-com? Just me? Okay.**

**Hope you enjoyed! I'd love to hear your opinions on this particular dilemma so drop me a review! I'm working on my next chapter for Finding Love Again, but its slow going. Thanks for all the love, reviews, and patience! Love you guys!**


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